Real Life

I've been hurting over our loss again the past two weeks. I've been very emotional and very tired. I've been drained and on the verge of tears for days. I am joyful, but I'm sad. 

A friend recently wrote to me regarding the loss of unborn children:

"They get Real Life right away - euphoria"

To be honest, that was hard to read at first. But it's true. They are born into heaven never to experience the hurts, pains, and disappointments of this world. But I'm selfish. I want my baby. I want to snuggle. I want to kiss those little cheeks. I want to count those tiny toes. I want to hold my baby in my arms. I want to hear that delightful cry in the middle of the night.

But it's not about what I want. It's about what God has planned. And it's hard sometimes. It's hard to put my selfishness aside and think about God's plan. And God's grace. That my little one is in heaven with the Father. No pain, no hurt, no disappointment.

After I read my friend's email I remembered this hymn and thought I'd share it with you. The second verse really spoke to my heart.

Safe in the Arms of Jesus

by: Frances J. Crosby

Safe in the arms of Jesus, 

Safe on His gentle breast;

There by His love o'ershaded,

Sweetly my soul shal rest.

Hark! 'tis the voice of angels

Borne in a song to me,

Over the fields of glory,

Over the jasper sea.

Refrain:

Safe in the arms of Jesus,

Safe on His gentle breast'

There by His love o'ershaded,

Sweetly my soul should rest.

Safe in the arms of Jesus,

Safe from corroding care,

Safe from the world's temptations'

Sin cannot harm me there.

Free from the blight of sorrow,

Free from my doubts and fears:

Only a few more trials,

Only a few more tears!

(refrain)

Jesus, my heart's dear Refuge,

Jesus has died for me;

Firm on the Rock of Ages

Ever my trust shall be.

Here let me wait with patience,

Wait till the night is o'er;

Wait till I see the morning

Break on the golden shore.

(refrain)